Rooting for the underdog

I was visiting a local family of an English teacher from another school recently.  We sat, as normal, around a table, having a cup of tea and adoring their two young grandchildren.  One, five years old, the other two.  The younger girl is quite good at reciting English and Russian phrases on command much to the delight of her family. Both grandparents marvel in her presence, as she looks almost Russian with lighter hair and blue eyes.  In my visits, almost every time she enters the room they exclaim with glee about how cute and bright she is. The elder girl is quieter but I think just as cute and I secretly long for her to be acknowledged and celebrated as well. 

It’s not uncommon for families to have their “favorite” child and they’re not shy about vocalizing which child they prefer, even in the presence of the children themselves. They may say which student studies better, which one is lazy and which one is bad. At first this was quite shocking to me, especially when I’m asked which child or student I prefer the most.  I diplomatically reply that all of them are equal and each possesses different qualities that are special.  Even if I have preferences they are always for the students who try hard, pay attention and show alacrity for learning, but I never display or vocalize them to the students.  In the classroom I try to treat every student equally.  Nonetheless, children most likely know whom their parents and teachers prefer.  

This reminds me of how American families will sometimes decide “Mom’s favorite” and tease that child for most of their lives.  These observations, at least in my opinion, are solely based on speculation as most of the mothers I know would never dream of choosing their favorite child-each is an individual so how can one even compare? 

During my visit, the grandmother was talking to me about how wonderfully bright the 2-year-old was and how well she learns English and Russian.  Although I’ve been to their house several times, it’s a reoccurring topic.  This time she was telling me how weak the older girl was and that she ate very little.  I asked when she would begin kindergarten and they said she would start this fall but they were thinking of keeping her back because she was weak. I saw no inclination that she had any learning disability, other than just being quiet and shy, which could easily fade following some encouragement.  I said that I didn’t believe she was “weak” but that going to school would help her learn and become stronger.  While the 2-year-old is cute in how most 2-year-olds are, I see no reason to ignore the older girl and wish she received a bit more encouragement to break her out of her shell. 

Perhaps I have a weakness for the underdogs—I did choose to come to help AZ over staying and helping the US after all, and I’ll continue to root for underdeveloped Z over overdeveloped Baku any day—but I’ve seen too many children simply ignored in the school system, leading them to fall through the cracks.  I can’t help but think that with a little more attention, more encouragement, those kids could believe in themselves and find their own way. 

With the school year officially ending this week and given that by the time the school year actually gets into full swing next year (official first day is Sept 15^th, though classes aren’t into gear and regular until mid October) I know my days of teaching are winding down.  I’m trying to see if any changes have occurred since my arrival and I can gladly report sincere progress in the 5^th form. Some of the children may have parents, neighbors or siblings who help them with their homework/do it for them, while there are others who do it themselves and have come such a long way.  One of the students is a quiet boy but he’s eager to learn and has no one at home to help him.  In the beginning of the year I could see his eyes light up during the lesson.  As the months went on he seemed more confused and began to give up doing his homework for fear of making mistakes.  I spoke with him privately one day and told him that he needed to continue to do his homework and even if he made mistakes, he would learn from them.  He’s been consistent ever since and although he still makes errors he doesn’t give up.  He can’t hide his smile after answering correctly though, which I mirror. He has grown so much since September and I’m glad he kept at it and enjoys class.

Gulhanim and I worked tirelessly to develop their listening and speaking skills and I’m so happy to be able to speak these 11-year-olds in English, see the wheels turning in their little heads and wait for their response in English.  There are noticeably some students who have disabilities and need much more one-on-one care than the system offers but they are never fully left out of our lessons.  Last year I couldn’t say that. Most teachers are comfortable ignoring those who can’t answer and never try.  They leave them be.  Gulhanim does a wonderful job moving to include everyone as she knows that even if they won’t enter university or leave this town, she can still help them learn something.  I’ve seen a lot of changes in her teaching but this may be one of my favorites. 

She’s also grown a lot in the past year and I’m comfortable leaving in a few months knowing I’ve helped the most motivated English teacher in the town go beyond what she thought she could do.  I’m faithful that she’ll keep it up after I leave.  We need more people like her rooting for the little ones, the undeveloped places, the underdogs.  After all, like someone once said: you’re only as good as your weakest player.